08/01/2013 Your biggest regret in life

     This one was pretty hard for me to think of.. I thought of one that probably doesn't seem that hard but it was really hard for me. Maybe just because I'm a really sensitive person.

     So once upon a time I had this boyfriend. We dated pretty seriously and truly did love him. The biggest problem was that I did not fit in with his family at all. I felt uninvited and his brother was actually pretty rude to me. Any time I went to his house with all of his family there I felt really uncomfortable. Which was a big deal to me because I always wanted in laws that I could hang out with and be myself in front of (which I got luckily)!

    Well after about 4 months of dating he was preparing for a mission (I'm sure you know where this is headed now..). It was really hard for me when we'd talk about him leaving because 2 years seemed so long to me and I didn't know what would happen. I'd try not to cry in front of him because I definitely supported him serving a mission! I always told him there were no promises whether I'd wait or not and that we'd just see what happens. Well a couple weeks leading up to him leaving I made a dumb decision. I promised him I'd be here when he was back and that I wouldn't date. I really thought I was going to marry him. I remember him being in the Provo MTC and at the time I lived in Orem so I felt so close but so far away from him! That was rough on me. It was easier when he left for Argentina. I'd go to his parents house for mothers day and Christmas calls but always felt like I shouldn't be there.

     Then of course I met Mark and fell head over boots for that guy! I was comepletely honest with both of them from the beginning. I told Mark all the time that I had somebody else and that I made a promise to him and I told the missionary everything about Mark. I'd tell him when I started hanging out with him, when feelings started and when I made my decision. It was all very confusing and hard for me. I didn't understand why I'd have to hurt someone that I truly cared for. He was a really great guy and I know he'll find an amazing girl and I know Mark is a better match for me than ANYONE. The only thing I do regret is breaking that promise.